Realigning with my goals
Sleep deprivation, a delayed winter issue for the supper club magazine, brain fog, adjusting to running the supper club by myself, and creative frustrations, that is how my 2018 started. This time around, the typical heady excitement, the list of resolutions and butterflies in my stomach were a no-show. Instead, I stepped into the new year with intentions to continue to build and expand on the goals I had set for myself last year, which was, in a nutshell, to build TSC & HOC. 2018 will be no different, this means business as usual for me. I suppose January can go down as my adjustment month for this year.
It has been quite some time since I last sat down to write and share. It wasn’t intentional, but halfway through 2017, I gave up on the blogging portion of HOC. I also stopped sharing recipes because I felt I lacked the knowledge and experience within the areas I was most interested in exploring. When I first started on the journey for HOC, I subconsciously came in with the intention of presenting and sharing my creations from the standpoint of someone who had already mastered them to a great level, the perfectionist within me was front and center and running things (unfortunately). This very lofty approach turned out to be a very frustrating load to bear.
There was also a major distraction on another platform (you know where I'm going with this). As is normal with the process of food blogging, or just blogging with a purpose, social media platforms serve as a middleman, a way to drive traffic to your content. I was not careful and i found myself being distracted by the middleman, instead of focusing my attention on my goals. I didn't realise it, but I ended up sacrificing quite a bit of the fun throughout my journey so far, the joy of the community as well as my growth, because I was so caught up in keeping up.
I'm referring to Instagram…… With its ever-changing rules, quick turn around times and that ability to render work that took a great deal of effort and time, disposable and forgotten. Don’t get me wrong though, Instagram can be a wonderful and powerful platform, it is, after all, where I’ve met some really amazing people, it is where the supper club community was established and is now growing beautifully.
Without a doubt. I . HAVE. BEEN. CAUGHT. UP. On too many occasions, I found myself, stressing and complaining about the ever-changing algorithms, shadow bans, finding the perfect hashtags. I’ve been caught up in playing the comparison game, hoping for all the likes and comments and followers. The desire for instant gratification had me distracted and failing to create a backend for the work I’ve been putting in along with running the risk of losing a very significant dimension on this journey, The vocal dimension. And that is what I want to get back to.
But I do believe there is some joy to be had here. It's all about the middle ground, once you find it, it is in my experience so far, that the platform becomes less of an issue and hindrance and you can begin to really use it to your advantage. But the tricky part is finding it, that sweet spot of not getting caught up in the politics of the platform.
Around October last year, when renovations started in my home, I was forced to stop posting on instagram all together, it was then that I really got time to think, time to assess my journey and remind myself of my goals, not only did I recognise and accept that I allowed myself to be affected by the goings on of instagram, but I also realised that when it comes to the blogging portion of HOC, it’s ok to not be an expert, to not know what I’m doing and that sharing my journey could be as equally exciting and fun as sharing perfectly executed end results. I can take my time to create, make mistakes, be imperfect and learn.
And with all that said, here's my list of hopes for this year;
- Creative & Personal growth - from my photography to my cooking and beyond
- To start writing again
- To Explore the different palettes that I love (without fear) in the food world and share the journey, regardless of how imperfect it may be.
- Continue to grow with the supper club and the wonderful people within the community.
Here's to a successful 2018! Kay xx