Most of us enter the new year filled with the greatest of intentions, we see it as a fresh start and we welcome it with hopes that this year will be “my year”. For some, however, the idea of setting intentions/resolutions is a pointless and overly zealous tradition, i’ve seen countless posts/memes on social media poking fun at those that make their resolutions and break them by the end of January. Though I wouldn’t go as far as saying that a New Year will bring a new me, I can say that i’m definitely a fan of New year resolutions and intentions, because they’re a sign of hope and mindfulness. The very act of setting intentions for oneself is a clear indication that we are at the very least, wanting to achieve and make changes and that we indeed want to see growth within ourselves.
At the end of 2015, I was particularly inspired to do more of what I loved. I had two goals, one was to create what is now House Of Coce and the second was to roll out a collaborative project I had pitched to a group of amazing green beauty bloggers. These goals became my new year resolution for 2016. I was filled to the brim with ideas, the very thought of bringing them to life brought butterflies to my stomach. The aura that followed me around was thick and dense and I was high on it, I was at my most inspired, most hopeful and extremely excited for what laid ahead. I wanted to expand the platform that I already had. I love natural skincare and I was digging the direction that I was taking Coce Skincare, there’s so much more to the picture, so much more driving that love.
But as I mentioned, we are all too familiar with what comes next, once the resolutions are set, the hardest part for most is usually sticking with them and seeing them through. While I did stick with my resolutions, I did digress.
HOC was intended to be launched in March of 2016, then again in June, then late Summer and then finally in October of 2016, but it never happened. Why? because I got hyper focused on tiny and sometimes insignificant details, because sometimes during my almost non-existent creative process (having a creative process kills my creativity so I tend to avoid a very structured process) I can be very indecisive, I dissect and over analyse, I'm sometimes very picky and if a thing isn’t exactly how I intended it to be, I'm not scared to scrap it and start again…..Just ask the walls in my living room that got painted a total of 4 times in the space of a 2 weeks because the particular shades of paint were not what I had envisioned.
The beauty project was to be rolled out for the summer of 2016, which also did not happen, however, the reasons for delay were completely out of my hands. Regardless, it was still another source of frustration and anxiety.
I became my own worst critic and to add the cherry on top of my self-inflicted distractions, I started to develop an acute fear of failure and of getting it wrong, sending me into an unrelenting state of over thinking things. oy vey!
Suffice it to say that by year end I was less than impressed with myself…..I was disappointed. I felt as though I had let myself down, I didn’t achieve the goals that I had set. I wasn’t excited to bring in 2017, that is, until it occurred to me that these are long term goals, plans get delayed, ideas shift and evolve, creativity is not set and bound, it's messy, crazy, it strikes at the oddest of moments and recedes when it is forced. These plans do not belong to 2016, they belong to me and I get to decide how these dreams of mine play out, however, in order to do that, I need to learn to respect my own pace, respect my 'non process process' and even try to enjoy it more by living in the moment.
So my new year resolution for 2017 is to jump. “You jump I jump jack”
I’ll be jumping with everyone else, jumping into 2017 with the next phase of this journey, i'll focus on the here and now, i'll respect my own time and i'll be kinder to myself. Ready or not i’ll be going against my own fears and i’ll be taking that leap. My hope is to fly! So i’m jumping with you all and i’ll be doing it with a smile on my face and hope in my heart.
With all this said, I hope that your 2017 has gotten off to a determined and inspired start for you. Here’s to a steady, soul serving, successful and enriched 2017.
Happy New Year everyone!